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I’m afraid I cannot give my speech properly on ‘game addiction’ this Friday. I’m very afraid of that. I’m afraid I cannot answer those questions from the audience as the forum is running. I’m afraid I cannot pronounce words properly when it starts. I’m afraid I will lose my best friends as we are being abroad some day, very near from now on…really miss you all friends…Sahrul,The most........... j , hafiz…

...sAhRuL....ThE c...

3 hours discussion…it was not too bad I think. I really want to…I really want to follow the trip. Trip to Kuala Terengganu is the best journey in my life…Terengganu, my hometown… I miss you. It has been a month I never see you. I really want to join such journey with friends especially Sahrul, the CUTEST. I like traveling a lot. I am eager to see hills and trees…the mountains and islands…and of course Sahrul, my best friend…foreverrrrr…What such a cute boy???haha…like my little brother…

I really want to travel… anywhere as long as it takes at least 8 hours to reach. I plan to travel to Johor Bahru, Perlis, Ipoh and Alor Setar when I finish my priority and work at UNITEN. That was the second biggest plan in my life…Sahrul…thanks a lot.

i LikE iT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I like politics…too much I like…no one expects Selangor would be held by opposition parties from now on…no one… it is just like a warfare…like what I play ‘Rise and Fall’, a game of war…sometimes we should retreat and of course if it a fate. I like politics…what such an enthusiastically field!!!!! I like it…the whole pages of New Straits Times, comprising of polling events nationwide today…no one expects I was dire excited about the recent biggest event of Malaysia specifically…

What such a strong party in the state of Kelantan!!! That’s what admired me a lot. It was very strong and even stronger than before…I really respect the Kelantan Menteri Besar. What such a successful person he was!!!...successfully retained again Kelantan… Well done!!! And for all losers…never being disappointed by the recent result…there is time…utilize your time to the fullest.

afraid...

Every time I keep on thinking and thinking then, thinking about Sahrul, The Cutest…when would we meet again while being abroad…I really hope you do well in everything for your brightness…I always pray for you…thinking and thinking then…computer online test…how would I play with such Microsoft Excel this evening. Wondering…

I feel sick and sick then. It was very painful…very painful. I feel I could not stand anymore. I cannot… it was a very long time I did not put my word in blog. Is it on purpose? I do not know what to say here. Many things crossed in my minds from the time being, things that upset me a lot. Within the sadness, somehow, the happiness would come even once in a month. But there are things that were really annoying and unaccepted. Why must I think about others and their future life? Why must I take care of each person in this world? Is it because of I am going to be a teacher in which I have to show my concern to all my students in school? Is it what we call a good teacher? Or is it because they had been my best friends? Long I stood…

iT cOmEs AgAiN...

Day and day went by. I keep on thinking what happens on me while being abroad in four years time. I keep on wondering how I am going to survive with no more Dr.Yusri, Dr.Rose, Dr.Ahmad Kamal and Mr.Alan Cheah, people who contribute to the greatest in understanding me during classes. I wonder what kind of people I would be meeting and befriend with………………..really hope to be with you all, friends for the entire life… can’t imagine how sad would I be without you all... I can’t imagine that…

huhhhh...

My Academic Study Skills (ASSF103) presentation was over… now; I have to focus and concentrate on the three killer subjects: Physics, Chemistry, and Calculus. Many things happened this week, joy things and even worth things I think. However, fortunately I like the things which more or less taught me how to be an independent person. While working on the ASSF103 assignment, I learnt how important to be involving in a team work. I learnt how we should care each other in order to come to a complete work.

But I am afraid for the presentation result that will be announced in a short time. What marks does our group gain? Would this presentation really help us improve our grade? Would it be? Whatever it is, never let ourselves down and always keep yourself in the right line. Remember that we have so many things to do to meet with our goals for better life in the future time.

bEsT oF tHe BeSt ...

I have to come back to UNITEN at 10 p.m dated 8th February last night. That was the only earliest ticket that my father found the moment before I depart from UNITEN. What such a fate!!! I thought I could not go home. But that was before I received good news from my father’s call. I went back on seventh on Thursday luckily. Having not less than 10 hours journey from Hentian Kajang, Kuala Lumpur to my hometown, Kuala Terengganu, I thought it was a great and the most beloved trip I never had and felt before. I like this trip which entirely refreshed my whole mind. I like to see some hills, decorated with oil palm and rubber trees. I like to see beaches along east coasts of Malaysia with no exception of beaches in my own state. I like to get onto buses and ride to any places very far from my stand. And lastly I had them all… like my friend said, appreciate every single moment that you have… : ) hAvE A nIce JoUrNeY ( :

sadness returns.......... : (

It was a very long moon since I ended myself from blogging. I feel so sad today and ever… I cannot go home. I cannot see my brothers and sisters in Terengganu. I cannot see my Mom although for a second. I cannot you my dear fish. I cannot. All tickets had been clearly sold and nothing left. I cannot do anything about this… It was so sad to tell… : (

LoNg i...

Long I stood, thinking and thinking then, thinking about what pieces of words I am going to put into my blog, thinking about how I am going to deal with the stressful life and feeling, thinking on how to stop thinking about what I don’t want to think of. Everywhere I stood I will think about my brothers and sisters especially my Mom in my birth land with no exception of my Dad. I will think about my guppies, the most beloved creature of my possession. I will think about Syahrul and Fazhil and the rest, the “legend” friends I would never forget. As the time went by, I think it was not so bad to befriend with them. I just loved them too much. And my advice here: Appreciate your life to the fullest.

I’m very afraid of my future life. Nothing is more than that. I was wondering how could I live in such big cities without right pronunciations and bad speaking skill. How I’m going to interact and communicate with people around when I reached there? Would I understand the words that come out from their native mouths? Would I? Would there be something interesting me that would ‘boom’ my lonely feeling and dire sadness at all? Would there a person who is really caring and helpful towards my life especially in my studies like my friends did here? Would there?

I am just a ‘kampong’ boy. I just want to learn and learn and learn something. But overseas is not my preference. Sometimes, I just want to drive my Mom here and there, having a look at some hills and trees. But I really want to improve my speaking and listening skills to the fullest. I really want to be a speaker whose pronunciations cannot be denied at all. And that I try to train myself to come out with words I could think the moment I am alone and free.

I need someone besides me…I need people to be at my sides…

If there is something wrong, I admit it is my entire fault. Nothing to do with you. It is just me who did it. From the bottom of my heart, I beg you, please forgive me for all the wrongdoing…I just want that… just let me know what’s the matter. It is merely less than six month I would see your face, friend…I am too afraid about it…too afraid. No one can tell that. You are just like my brother…remember that!!! You have contributed a lot in my life. You have trained me to become a good teacher. You have boosted a very precious idea on how to deal with future students. I beg you, brother!!!

Wondering all the time… I have little to say up to now. The real fact is that I am in great need of rest. The bus!!! I need to board a bus. I need to be in such transportation in order to have speedy recovery of my reputation. I need kind of greenery surroundings and peacefulness. I need trees and some hills to examine in order to recuperate my condition. I need thousands of calmness to store what I have learnt in my little brain. I need to step away from such depression, the only one I am afraid of. I need some help from friends to head me to the very right path, the most precious gift from The Loved One, Allah The Mighty…

“Ohh I thought…if I do this, I will never return to England with honour”. ‘The Patriot’ is still being the best for me at the present anyway. And ‘Narnia’ too.

One quiz left, the Physics quiz, in which it trembles me a lot. Physics needs us to have kind of critical thinking while solving any sorts of problems we encounter. Physics would only be in one’s possession who really loves it. That is what Dr. Yusri always says to us. He never stops from saying that. “You must love Physics and you have to in order to score better”. That is what he often says during lecture time. As for me, it has a very deep meaning, a very good motivation I think.

It is very crucial for a teacher to have a fluent and good ways of teaching that would make the students understand what he or she is trying to say. But how many teachers nowadays have such capabilities. My English language is very bad. I admit it. I am always thinking how I am going to teach my students in the future. I think and think then and think some more. But I respect my friends like Farah, Kak Wani, Kak Husna, Kak Fifi, Hazimah, Joseph, Lee and many others that they have a very good and fluent speaking and smooth teaching. They are all real teachers. From the time being, I try to improve mine. Syahrul had played a vital role in this matter. He had helped me a lot, training me to be a teacher with better ways of teaching…although he never noticed of that.

It ended slowly…very slow and dire soft. The stones had landed gently on the film of water. It was so soft. No more menace triggering chaos and uncertainty points of life. As I was eating a plate of rice incorporating a fried fish and a full spoonful of ‘kangkung’, I wondered how it was going to be. How the quiz would be run by Sir Alan? I had been wondering the matter while putting the meal into my mouth, passing esophagus. Feeling very depressed that I could not go home for this ‘awal Muharram’ and spends time to refresh my mind, I was quite disappointed. And that was the point too. But I would say it was quite good for me as it would be the best time for me to start my bigger aim. I still remember it that I would hold it in my mind all the time…every second…!!!